Why, when you're truly in love, don't you fuss about the little things? How to find out and what to do? A great approach to exploring the balance between love and fussing over small things! Here’s a structured way to dive deeper into this:
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Start a 60-90 Day Journal: Begin by jotting down things you frequently fuss over in the relationship. Note the situations, feelings, and any patterns in what bothers you.
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List What You Love About Your Partner: Each day, add to a list of what you genuinely appreciate about your partner. This can help you stay connected to the positives and may also reveal whether small irritations are clouding bigger, meaningful qualities.
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Explore Long-standing Obsessions: Write about things you’ve always been particular or “obsessed” about, even outside the relationship. Are these habits or ways of thinking affecting how you see minor flaws in your partner?
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Revisit Your First List: Go back to your list of “fusses.” Check if they match up with your obsessions or if they seem separate. This can help you understand if these issues are more about your habits than about incompatibility.
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Consider Your Contributions: Write down what you bring to the relationship—both the things your partner appreciates and the ones they might occasionally critique.
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Look at Yourself from the Outside: Step back and imagine the relationship without your specific “flaws.” Are these things you’d be willing to change or work on?
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Reflect on Their Complaints: Think about what your partner has brought up. Are they focused on certain “flaws” of yours, or do they largely accept you as you are?
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Examine Their Acceptance: Consider whether they’re choosing to love you fully, including any quirks or differences. Are they accepting these because they care for you, or are these things they merely tolerate?
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Highlight Compatibility: Make a list of areas where you both align well. These strengths are worth investing in and building on together.
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Recognize True Love vs. Small Fussing: This final point ties it all together—if you’re truly in love, your connection should make it easier to overlook minor issues in favor of the big picture.
This exercise can help you see if your fussing is about deeper issues or just surface-level habits that don’t impact your love. It’s about finding clarity on what matters most and whether it’s love driving you to embrace each other fully.